Theme Song, Please

To be honest, I am not a fan of proms. My school doesn't have one, and I don't dance anyhow, so I have been spared the contagion of "Oh hey, let's go dance in four-inch heels and see how long it is before we twist our ankles." I was recently looking through a bunch of prom catalogs and was surprised to see how many of the themes were variations on the theme of "All You Need is Love", thank you, Beatles. I just kind of sat there and was like, "Wow, how many weeks after prom will these couples be broken up and pretending that the other person doesn't exist?" In the spirit of the thing, I have taken the liberty of compiling a list of prom themes and their little-known subtitles.

I Hope You Dance (I Hope You Can Dance So I Don't Have to Lead)
Hearts on Fire (Maybe That's Why We're Getting Funny Looks)
Whispers of Forever (Hmm, When Did I Last Brush My Teeth?)
Gateway to Destiny (Too Bad It's Locked)
A Heavenly Night (It Won't Seem That Way During Your 6 AM Shift)
Paradise Awaits (In California, So Why Are You Still Here?)
A Night on the Town (You're Paying, Right?)
Moonlight Serenade (Has Anyone Ever Told You You Can't Sing?)
Under the Stars (Waaay Under [Featuring Vinny & the Moles])
Let the Music Begin (So I Don't Have to Rack My Brain for Things to Say to You)
Always & Forever (These High-Heels Will Be Stuck on My Feet)

I had a few more, but I thought this was enough for now.

And no, I am not bitter over a terrible prom experience involving chewing gum, Superglue, and a pair of stiletto heels. I just think that high school functions should be taken with a grain of salt.